Love is a strong, thrilling emotion that can sometimes appear to be incredibly complex. It appears to be an illusive but constant feeling. These and other situations make it challenging to determine whether you actually love someone.
Another problem is the fact that love can exist in many distinct ways. This makes it more difficult to determine whether you are actually in love with someone. It is implied that you might not be able to identify the form of loving you are now experiencing right away.
Once more, researchers have discovered that love can be just as addictive as drugs like cocaine and nicotine. Therefore, those exhilarating feelings you may be feeling could be obstructing your ability to perceive things clearly. Nevertheless, love can snare you and emerge from a source you least expect.
Because of this, it could be difficult to identify the kind of love you’re experiencing and determine whether you’re really in love with someone.
So, the purpose of this post is to assist you in determining if you are actually in love with someone or not. It’s extremely possible to discern if someone is the one you really love, even though the task might not be simple.
A Quick Note:
It’s important to acknowledge that there are several kinds of love before moving on. As we proceed, this is quite significant. The reason is that a lot of individuals make the error of believing that only intense love is true love. They consider all other forms of love to be false.
Most people merely desire the type of love that Diana Barrows describes in It Takes Two—“that can’t eat, can’t sleep, reach for the stars, over the fence, World Series kind of love”—because it is so intense.
Truth be told, however, it’s the constant and unassuming kind of love that endures. In actuality, the parties in any fulfilling and enduring love relationship have come to the realisation that love is about more than just dopamine surges.
They are aware that true love means valuing everything. This contains both the highs and lows, the good and the bad, etc.
Being in love with someone and loving them.
You need to understand something very crucial while trying to figure out how to tell if you’re in love with someone. This is due to the fact that “falling in love” and “loving” someone is two very different things.
For starters, it is a fact that we cannot constantly be in the euphoric state of “falling in love.” The experience of “falling in love” with someone is a temporary chemical high.
Unfortunately, the majority of people classify and yearn for this as true love. Perhaps the major reason so many people suffer so much suffering in the name of love is this yearning for something so fleeting and elusive.
This is a deliberate choice you make when it comes to loving someone. To stay together, to believe in them, and to care for them requires a commitment. You come to understand that there will be sunny days when you love someone. Additionally, you recognise that certain days can be gloomy, dark, or even rainy.
Thus, unlike what most social media, movies, and popular culture would have us believe, true love is surely not all sunshine and rainbows.
As a result, there will be occasions when you’ll think that your once-deep sentiments of love have begun to fade. However, you’ve come to understand that this does not necessarily imply that you still love the individual.
True Love and Affective (Emotional) Response.
True love is a long-lasting emotional connection between two people. True romantic partners have actively cultivated this link through their “emotional response.”
Your capacity to comprehend and respond appropriately to your partner’s emotions is known as emotional responsiveness. This is crucial in situations where your partner might no longer feel comfortable sharing personal information with you. However, sometimes these emotions may have nothing to do with you at all.
Love will always be a sensation, no matter how it makes you feel. Love is prone to ebb and flow depending on a variety of conditions, just like any other emotion.
Your response to these changes will determine whether or not your love endures. Is your love worthy of sacrifice? If so, you will have to decide whether to keep it going.
Everyone experiences true love differently.
The fact that not everyone experiences love in the same manner makes it even harder to determine if you are in love with someone.
The fact that a person’s life experiences and relationship history play a crucial role in this is one of the reasons, among others. Such encounters may affect their perception of how a “normal” love attraction progresses.
The truth is that even some of the happiest and most enduring partnerships have different methods of experiencing love. Every amazing love connection is a somewhat distinct variation of the love experience, just as humans differ from one another.
Because of this, it’s common to hear people claim that “love operates in mysterious ways.” And I agree wholeheartedly with it. Most of the time, it’s not as dramatic as they make it out to be or want it to be. Love occasionally has a very quiet beginning but a very strong impact.
How to Identify If You Really Love Someone
In fact, you must understand that there is no one way to definitively determine whether what you’re experiencing is true love or only intense infatuation.
Since there are no clear-cut classifications or telltale symptoms to identify true love, how can you tell if someone is the one for you? What does loving someone actually entail and require?
Fortunately, if you pay close attention to how you feel and behave around that special someone, you can learn a lot. You should be able to determine whether you’re truly in love with someone by paying close attention to your emotions, your body’s responses, and your behaviour.
Given the foregoing, here are some crucial physical and emotional indicators you should watch out for to determine whether you are actually in love with someone.
1. You Miss Having Them Around.
The most obvious of all, I suppose. This is due to the fact that it is only normal to want to spend a lot of time with someone you love. You begin to value your time with them more highly than many other aspects of your life. This frequently illustrates how intertwined your lives have gotten.
In reality, while you’re with each other, you don’t give a damn what you do. You just want to be with them, plain and simple. And frequently, this occurs regardless of your individual states of mind or energies.
Additionally, your commitment to the relationship can frequently be gauged by how much you miss your particular someone. This need not, however, be an obsessional feeling.
For instance, you can train yourself to consider their viewpoint whenever you read a book, watch a nice movie, or put on some new clothes. It’s also acceptable to contact them on occasion via phone or text in order to speak with them and inquire about their well-being.
A truly healthy love relationship should allow you to spend time apart from your significant other. Never should you be in a situation where you are always thinking about what they are doing. If it becomes excessively fixated, you might just be infatuated with them.
True love blends into your real-life without becoming overbearing. It neither usurps nor disrupts your existence.
2. With them, you feel safe and trusted.
An essential component of creating a committed, long-lasting relationship is trust. So, being able to fully trust someone is a wonderful indication that you really love them.
You simply can’t help but notice how your anxiety eases up around that particular someone. This frequently means that you’ve started to believe what they say. It demonstrates that you trust them enough to reveal your insecurities and faults.
3. You Start to Feel Jealous.
A small bit of envy is actually acceptable in good relationships and is not necessarily harmful. Like any other emotion, jealousy is something you may experience; what matters is how you handle it.
Naturally, jealousy is a relational adaptation. It’s a sensation that really makes the couples more receptive to dangers to their relationship. This can be the case with a desirable coworker your partner frequently makes mention of. It may also be the way they still inevitably feel about an ex-lover.
It’s not love if you discreetly check your partner’s cellphone or act suspiciously envious of them. Such behaviour is more of a sign of relationship anxiety, low self-esteem, and ongoing uneasiness.
However, those who display reactive or emotional jealousy are frequently more devoted to their partnerships. Such envy is typically indicated by favorable relationship traits like dependability and trust. On the other hand, when the partners’ level of trust grows, most jealousy tends to diminish.
4. You Want Them to Be Happy.
Being loved is not the only aspect of love; it can also be shown to others. In actuality, genuinely loving someone isn’t about what you get in return because you’re satisfied with your love alone. Instead, sharing experiences and creating a life together are your main priorities.
Due to this, when someone truly loves you, their needs are put first in all of your actions and emotions. You prioritise them in your life and strive to bring them joy without anticipating anything in return. Whenever they appear to be going through severe circumstances, this is typically the case.
Therefore, loving someone involves more than just your sentiments for them. It also heavily influences the gifts you give to your loved someone. This is one of the best indicators that someone is the one for you.
5. They Motivate You to Improve Your Personality.
Your entire sense of self undergoes a dramatic alteration when you fall in love. Typically, everything around you appears more intriguing.
Your thoughts, routines, and how you spend your time are likely to be impacted by this. Most of the time, you unconsciously wish to emulate your special someone’s attributes and qualities.
Indeed, numerous studies have demonstrated that falling in love is connected to self-expansion. This indicates that you typically develop as a person. Additionally, you are more eager to venture outside of your comfort zone and experience new things.
This isn’t about faking to like what your significant other likes in an effort to win them over. It has more to do with how they easily inspire you to want to improve yourself and live a more fulfilling life.
Therefore, you’d know you’re in love with someone if they actively encourage you to start addressing your character flaws and improving yourself.
After all, true love is about improving your relationship by becoming better people together.
6. You Foresee a Future With Them.
Spending time with someone makes sense when you’re actually in love with them. Therefore, it makes sense when you find yourself transferring your attention from the here and now to considering the future for the two of you.
When you truly love someone, it becomes quite difficult to imagine your future without them. When making decisions about your future, such as picking a new job, a new home, a trip, or even new ambitions, you naturally have a tendency to put them first.
Try to close your eyes and visualise yourself someday being with this person. What emotions does this cause you to feel? Can you gauge your body’s response?
Do you have a sense of enlargement, warmth, and an exciting future with them? If you feel differently, your body may be trying to get your attention about something.
Finally, everyone wants to experience the beautiful feeling of falling in love with someone. In fact, every person experiences it at some point in their life as they work to develop a strong and enduring love relationship.
Relationships that the last call for more than just contentment and a positive sensation when your particular someone is around. A long-lasting love connection also needs reciprocal investment and devotion.
Always keep in mind that there are several types of love. Therefore, it is impossible to pinpoint your specific feelings in a single way.
Being able to pay attention to how you act and feel around your significant other is the key to determining whether you are actually in love with them. You can determine if you are truly in love and have discovered the one by paying attention to how your body is responding generally.